Let’s totally set aside the fact that two of the three top stories are cartoons and let’s take a look at SpaceX Plans and congress.

WASHINGTON —  SpaceX and OneWeb say they are within months of launching the first satellites in their competing megaconstellations of broadband smallsats designed to bring internet to every corner of the globe.

Because, you know… a sphere has corners.

But hey, that is beside the point. We are trying to get internet to the entire world here, people. You know, because Google Loon doesn’t already exist. Someone please explain to me how a modem is supposed to connect to a miniature SAT traveling more than 17,000 miles per hour outside of the atmosphere, when a Satellite dish can’t even maintain signal with a stationary satellite on a rainy day?

Oh wait, I know…

It’s called fiber optic cable that is currently strung all across the ocean floor. That’s probably what SpaceX means when they say “competitive web provider“.

fib.pngSpace is fake. And if you don’t believe me, just take a glance at the other two top trending stories. They’re cartoons for crying out loud.

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